Why I Refused the Script

My honest account of following the script, paying the cost, and deciding to rewrite it after almost a half a century of not fitting in. Not a success story. A real one still in progress.

From a young age, somewhere around second grade sitting in Catholic School, I realized that I didn't like the scene around me. The lack of answers, getting the standard "because I told you so" from teachers and parents felt like the wrong answer. Did they not know the answers? Were they just being lazy? Whatever their excuse was I didn't like it.

That's been the story of my life. Not liking the answers I was given. Always thinking there was something I was missing. How did the people at the top, the people on the other end of this deal, get there?


It took me decades of reading, learning, and fixing my mindset to finally accept that I was allowed to build something of my own.

I'm approaching 50 years old. I've worked for the man. I've chased the corporate carrot. I've been in charge. I've been bossed around. None of it is me. I am tired of building someone else's dream. I am tired of stepping in all the bullshit.

There must be a better way to live life. Finding it is my goal.

I have seen others reach success, achieve their dreams. Are those people special? Gifted? Maybe some. But not all. Most are just like me — except for one thing. The way they think. The way they frame life. The way they keep going. The way they avoid the noise from those who don't dare try.

They take the wheel and control their own destiny.

There is no one to blame but myself. I have been in control this entire time and have done nothing with it. Accepting that is sad yet liberating. It cost me a lot of time yet it keeps me from wasting anymore.

The days count more now.

This is that build. Documented publicly.

It's uncomfortable. It forces accountability or I look like an ass.

Both outcomes are fine. Either way I'm moving.